It’s Okay To Be Human

Thank you to everyone who supported and participated in the It’s Okay campaign for August.

I really enjoyed sharing my thoughts with you each day and hopefully it brought some inspiration and/or motivation to you all.

With everything going on in the world, I felt everyone could use a reminder that it is okay not to be okay sometimes. We are human and humans feel a wide range of emotions. All of which are okay. Why?

Because our emotions are our guidance system, they offer us a deeper understanding of ourselves and how we interact with the world. They are valuable and essential to our growth. That is their value. One that is often overlooked. My hope is that putting the spotlight on each throughout the month has added to their value and perhaps assisted in understanding and growth.

Moving forward, I will be less present daily on my blog, but for a good cause. I have decided to take the time I was utilizing each morning before work and in my free time to finishing my next book. I set a deadline of completion for myself of Fall of 2020, but as everyone has experienced…nothing seems to go as planned this year!

I am still going to try my best to finish it yet this year, but in order to do that, I will be stepping away from my other writing projects & platforms in the meantime. I will try to share pieces with you along the way and thank you in advance for your patience.

This next book, the sequel to Insane Roots, has been challenging emotionally and sharing it with the world will require more courage than anything I’ve ever written. It will be a bit risky, but I can only hope it will be received warmly, with the knowledge that it was written from the heart, without malice and only with good intentions.

It’s Okay to be Sad

Day Ten: It’s okay to be sad

Yes, sadness does fall in the category of negative emotions, but without negative emotions we would have no basis for the positive ones.

I am a very positive person, most of the time, but it is because I thrive to be that way. I certainly wasn’t born that way. Friends of mine have jokingly referred to me as Positiffany, and laugh at the nauseatingly positive spin I put on things sometimes!

Hey, there could be worse traits to have!

And what is truly amazing about it, is that although I may seem that way to those around me, many times I am fighting my way to that place on the inside.

I have battled with anxiety and depression since I was very young and thus have been blessed with the knowledge of the contrast between positive and negative emotions.

I treasure moments of joy and bliss, because I’ve experienced their extreme opposites. I know what it’s like to hit rock bottom and therefore I value even the mediocre days just a little bit more than I think I would without those experiences.

It is perfectly normal to drop a few tears in your cheerios from time to time. After all, not every day is going to be a good day, but wouldn’t it be better to have those bad days every now and then to ensure you are fully appreciating the days that truly sparkle?

It is perfectly normal to feel sad, it means you are human, but it doesn’t have to be who you are. It is just an emotion, meant to be experienced and let go. Don’t be so hard on yourself about feeling sad, work through it and reach for those better feeling days that are sure to come.

“Boredom, anger, sadness, or fear are not ‘yours,’ not personal. They are conditions of the human mind. They come and go. Nothing that comes and goes is you.” – Eckhart Tolle

It’s Okay To Be Angry

Day Six: It’s okay to be angry.

Many would classify anger as a negative emotion, but it occurs at a higher emotional vibration than say disappointment or despair. In those moments there is little motivation to change our circumstance or resolve a solution to whatever dilemma we are facing.

Anger, however, sharpens our awareness, enhances our emotional intelligence and can lead to self-improvement by pushing us to reach our deeper self. It motivates us emotionally and physically to take control of the issue at hand and reach a resolution swiftly.

Not half bad really. Sounds more like a positive thing to me!

Now, obviously, not all anger is justified and sometimes it can lead to some less desirable behavior, but even in those instances, there is still a positive take away. Whatever is fueling that anger lies at the root of the real problem and identifying it is the first step in understanding how to change it.

The people who allow themselves to feel and understand their anger are the ones who allow themselves the opportunity for emotional and intellectual growth.

So the next time you are angry with someone or something, don’t hide from it, let yourself feel it. Doing so will help you develop a highly flexible emotional response system, which in return will make you more adaptive and resilient.

There will never be an end to the things/people that anger us, but it doesn’t have to be a negative aspect of life. It just means there will always be a chance to grow and better understand ourselves and the world around us.

With Hope,

@myinsaneroots

New Campaign & Book Updates!

As always, from my silence comes much inspiration. I’m up to 23K words written for the sequel of Insane Roots (so about 1/2 way there). I was hoping for a release date sometime this fall and I believe that should still be the case, it just may be late fall 🤗

The process of writing this time around has been like stepping back in time, standing like a wallflower in the shadows of my former life. My journal has been a helpful tool in recapping the events of my youth, although hard to read at times. If you wade through the sadness and teenage angst, there is a timeline of crucial information. As with the first book, reliving the bullying and heartbreak of those years has been a therapy session all in itself.

One that has inspired me to dedicate the month of August to #mentalhealthawareness

Highlighting specifically that it is okay not to be okay sometimes. Something I wish someone would have told me during those trying years of high school and beyond. I spent so much energy back then hiding the way I was feeling and the depression and anxiety I battled on a daily basis. I tried to be someone I wasn’t, to fit in, to be “normal”.

Looking back, all I was doing by hiding inside myself was hindering the person I was to become. The person I am proud to be today. The ability to experience a variety of emotions at any given time is the gift of being human although at times it may feel like a curse.

To all those who were cruel to me in the past, I hold no malice nor wish them any ill will. They may be the reason I found it so hard to trust anyone for so long, but now that I am grown, I realize their actions were merely a reflection of emotions they themselves were struggling to deal with. We were all doing the best with could with our level of understanding of the world at that time.

Forgiveness is freeing and it allows us the ability to understand our adversaries from a common ground; being an emotional being.

We are over halfway through 2020 and it has not been easy, but if we are able to find a way to connect on some level of existence, surely we will be moving in the right direction towards unity rather than division.

One thing in life that I believe rings true for everyone is the inevitable truth that there are times in our lives when we are not at the top of our game. For whatever reason, we are not okay.

This August, I would like to remind you that it’s okay, not to be okay.

In fact, it is a healthy and natural part of being human.

Here and across my social media accounts, I shall dedicate each day to some form of not being okay and why that in itself is okay.

The takeaway, I hope, will be the understanding that although division in thought is inevitable, there will always be unity in emotion.

May it be a stepping stone to peace.  

This Much: A Poem For The Disregarded

Broken Pieces of you still clutter the floor of my mind.

Their preciously hidden strangeness,

A comfort to me in this, the absence of you.

Making love to our memories,

As they delicately tickle these thoughts in my head.

And for a moment, I forget…

That I am alone,

In this,

The most painful love song of all.

Unmistakably one-sided,

Unrequited and adrift.

Yet in the end,

The only one I’ve ever wanted…

This much.