Why Ya Gotta Be So Mean?!

Three times this morning I encountered someone being defensive for absolutely no reason. There was the lady at the gas station who flipped out on the clerk for not having their cigarettes in stock. Granted, I understand this may have been the result of a ‘nic fit’, but is that any excuse to behave like a child and take it out on the innocence person manning the counter? I would have to say no!

Then there was the driver who scowled at me and muttered something under their breath for crossing the street. Yes, I was in the cross walk and yes it was my turn. Apparently my existence was of great inconvenience to them at that time. Again, I understand that there are numerous potential reasons for this person’s behavior, maybe they were running late, but is that my fault? Again, I would have to say no!

Finally, there was an influx of emails that came in today with bold and capital lettering attacking me for something completely out of my control. Once again, I understand their frustration, but seriously folks stop shooting the messenger…

Why is it that in today’s society we are so quick to take our frustration out on others? Whatever happened to giving people the benefit of the doubt, loving thy neighbor and treating people with respect. Even my mother taught me to treat others as I wish to be treated (it was a do as I say not as I do teaching moment 🙂 ).

Say what you will about my mother’s actions in the past, but when it came to instilling core values in me, in my opinion she did a wonderful job. I was always reminded that there were many others out there less fortunate than us and that I should be grateful for all that I have. I was told not to stare at others because it was rude and made people feel uncomfortable.

When she would catch someone staring in our direction, she would say, “Take a picture, it lasts longer!” and then she would laugh and reiterate to me how rude that person was being.

She taught me never to make assumptions based on someone’s appearance or their circumstances. Something she knew people did regularly and often backfired on them in her years of deception. Kind of twisted when you think about it, but it has honestly done me a lot of good. I have found myself surrounded by some truly amazing people. Many of which I may not have given the time of day had I made a snap judgement based on the surface value of who they are.

Something my Step Father said to me at a very young age was to think before I spoke. He always said that it only takes a minute second to do and it can save us from ourselves in moments fueled by emotion when we run the risk of saying something we will regret later.

It was some of the best advice I have ever been given and something I plan to pass along to my children someday (God willing they are down the road :)).

Partnered with the wisdom of the collective that helped to raise me, I can’t help but think this had a very influential hand in aiding me in not only seeing things in a different way, but also in making me a person of great compassion. I feel things on such a deep level. Someone a close friend told me was referred to as an Empath. Which can be a bad thing when you don’t know how to control it. When I was younger it caused me to over react to many situations, but over time I have learned to harness this emotion and express it creatively instead.

I can’t watch an awards show without shedding tears of joy for the winners. When Lady Gaga won her Golden Globe, she gave a very emotional thank you to everyone and I blubbered like a baby! LOL
Even as I am writing to you about it now I can feel a lump in my throat 🙂

Don’t get me wrong, I still have my moments of over reacting though…don’t we all?!

Anyway, I guess the point I am trying to make is just how important it is to be conscious and aware. I truly believe we are all one and the more you embrace this concept the more connected you are to everything. Just think of how differently you would treat others if you felt more of a connection to them. I would like to think there would be less hate, jealousy, pain, etc and more love, consideration and kindness. That is the kind of world I want to live in and I strive every day to lead by example.

Happiness is contagious and so is negativity…the question is, which one do you want to spread?

 

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

16 thoughts on “Why Ya Gotta Be So Mean?!

  1. I’m an empath as well. Especially when I’m watching a reality show and someone is embarrassed I feel embarrassed for them. I’ve learned to harness over reacting and not letting it bother me so much. I used to think I was just too observant until I read about empathy. But I am aware of my surroundings. Maybe hypervigilance?(sp)

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  2. Persia, when there is a disproportionate negative action to a small slight, then someone is wound too tight or has something else on their mind. Good example is dealing with call center reps at a bank, insurance company, etc. The more patient and diplomatic you are the better the service to resolving your problem. Have a happy day, Keith

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