Life at my godparents’ house was great! I had a brother and sister to play with and a mother and father that I considered my own. Being a single mother, when mom and I were together, she didn’t always have time to entertain me and it was a nice change to always have something to do. It was also a nice distraction from the crazy events I had just experienced and the lingering question of where is my mom….
I was still unable to move around very well by myself, so my godfather installed an intercom next to my bed in case I had to pee during the night. I remember one time I buzzed him and said,
“I have to pee.”
After several buzzes, he replied, “How bad do you have to go?”
I paused, actually thinking about it and replied, “Bad enough to try and crawl if I have to.”
A few minutes later, still chuckling, John enters the bedroom. He picked me up and carried me to the bathroom, waiting outside the door for a signal that he may return to his peaceful slumber.
“You told me to buzz” I said as he set me back in bed.
He kissed me on the forehead and smiled. “I know…good night”
It sucked being so dependent on someone else all the time and sometimes I would try to hold it as long as I could so I didn’t have to wake him up.
I missed my mom, but a part of me was enjoying living in this new home, with this new family. I always felt so loved. There was a security in this house and with my Godparents. There always has been.
Looking back in my life, the first memory I can recall is of John. I must have been barely two years old. I remember, he would strum on his guitar and softly sing as I attempted with my young innocent voice to accompany him. We sang kid songs like “There was an old lady who swallowed a fly” and those I am most fond of, “Lady” and “Lucille”. To this day those songs make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. I always felt so secure and wanted when he was near. I never had to question his love or fear he would leave me. I am sure to this day he still has no idea how much it means to me to make him proud and have him near.